What the Flick

None of these shows has the wacky charm of THE X-FILES (will there ever be a more endearing oil & vinegar couple than Mulder and Scully?), nor are they likely to spawn the 180 MILLION sites that X-FILES brings up on Google, but I find the characters on SURFACE are the most interesting, and its premise (undersea creatures reminiscent of "Nessie" suddenly appear and start stirring up things) is broad enough to keep things interesting. What I like on SURFACE is its mix of the innocent (the Louisiana fisherman and the kid with the baby creature), the knowledgeable and pure-hearted scientist (the oceanographer mom played by Lake Bell), the random monster-caused problems that pop up each week, and the evil scientists (Evil you ask? Of course they're evil: they have accents) who know a lot more than they should about old Nessie's cousin. This allows a mix each week of suspense (what will they do next to shut up the oceanographer?), supernatural mystery (why did that Indian doctor's face heal SO QUICKLY?), and up-with-people optimism (the kid trying to befriend the creature). Mixing in the curious fisherman (who you just know is going to get in trouble either with the damn monster or the damn "government" agency) with the oceanographer has promise, in my book, and each week they add a few answers and then a new question or two. I think the drama would be much improved if the oceanographer sent her boring kid to boarding school or at least to live with his dad (worst-kid-actor-ever, at least since the one who played Anakin Skywalker as a child), but his part is small. My real disappointment on this show is the big fat sea monster, which in the first episode looked like Aquaman's fat grandmother, but at least was blurry and indistinct. Now it just looks like a reject from JURASSIC PARK: SEA WORLD. Why'd they have to show us so much of him? But ignoring that, the human drama here is compelling. My mom also gives it 2 thumbs up.

The cast of INVASION includes 2 "blended" familes, a creepy sheriff (the wonderful William Fichtner), some kind of government cover-up, the aftermath of a Florida hurricane, and the brilliant choice of the always mysterious Everglades as a setting. The chaos after the hurricane helps to disguise what appears to be an invasion of something or other that appear as yellow lights and as far as I can tell, get inside you and then take over. So far, the side effect seems to be a fascination with running water and a tendency to forget to call the kids. This show has the advantage of one super-handsome (could you swim in the dimples?) Latin-looking Park Ranger (Eddie Cibrian), who is also the father of the kids, husband of the TV reporter whose brother is the Lone Gunman of the Everglades, and ex-husband of the doctor who is now married to the creepy sheriff. Part of its appeal is this ONCE AND AGAIN meets BODY SNATCHERS combination, as in each of the 3 episodes I've seen there's either some family drama (Why are they staying at your place, with the no electricity and the hurricane damage and the location IN THE SWAMP?), or some mano-a-mano conversation between the 2 husbands (Sheriff flashing badge to scare off Park Ranger), or some other completely STUPID distraction from the events at hand. Clues turn up, more people start acting oddly, bodies vanish from the hospital.... it's all very B movie, but not in a totally bad way.

Then there's the NY TIMES (and to be fair, other critics') fave, THRESHOLD. What the F? I say. This show has good actors (Carla Gugino and Peter Dinklage, who I loved in THE STATION AGENT, among them), but feels like an episode of CSI: MIAMI (the absolute WORST CSI, ever), in the sense that they're all very attractive and eccentric (the nerdy pretty girl, the electronics genius, the mad scientist with a heart of gold) chasing a bunch of gobbledy-gook that they can't convince us they understand. It's like ALIAS (which is watchable because of the characters) without the charm of Jennifer Garner and Victor Garber, and the cast's ability to make us believe they know from where they speak. As on ALIAS, every other word is some high-tech crapola that means nothing (the Rambaldi Mueller Antigravity Juice Prophecy Satellite), but on ALIAS, the story is never about that -- it's about the subtext of the characters' relationships. If your whole "persona" outside work is a lie, how do you relate to people? If your father is a spy who may or may not have killed your Russian double-agent mother because she was behind a plot to have you killed, should you still buy him a Father's Day present? If both your fiances end up dead at the hands of international criminal syndicates, should you consider, you know, not dating? These types of questions don't arise on THRESHOLD. Instead, we're to believe the stars are members of the government's Contingency Planning Program (planning for weird events or disasters), and their job is to figure out how to deal with visitors from who knows where who sport triple-helixed DNA and, uh, aren't very nice. In fact, that's their motto: We have a plan. Not for nothing, but so far the US Government can barely deal with contingencies that start right here on earth and can be predicted days in advance. So the Aliens? Don't have to worry too much that their jig is up. Worse, at least so far, the characters don't seem to mesh as a group -- Carla Gugino is a nice girl, but she's less believable as the head of a government anything than Michael Brown or Juliana Margolies in last year's USA Network antiterror miniseries THE GRID (which, in fact was good, except for her). BTW, Mom gives this thumbs down, and I trust her judgment.

Back to the big screen for the next installment.

(C)2005 ljmb